When the Klingons Bear Their Guns

Sing to the tune of "When the Foeman bears his steel" from The Pirates of Penzance by Gilbert and Sullivan.

When the Klingons bear their guns

 

Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise!

 

Though we want to, no one runs

 

Yay Enterprise!

 

And we find the thing to do

 

Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise!

 

Is to ready all the crew

 

Yay Enterprise!

 

For when the warbird's here

 

Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise!

 

We really should appear

 

Yay Enterprise!

 

As though we think we'll win

And that we'll soon begin

And that we'll soon begin

 

Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay! Enterprise! Yay! Yay! Yay Enterprise!

 

Go ye Fleet Men, go and fight them! Though, they'll kill you in groups of ten. We'll stay here and write the orders. Go, fight for the Federation! Go get killed, or maybe just get injured, because none of you are ninjas. On bloodwine, we brass shall binge. Go ye Fleet Men go and fight!

 

Go ye Fleet Men, go and fight! Go ye Fleet Men, go and fight!

 

Though surely we can tell.

 

Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise!

 

That you Admirals mean well.

 

Yay Enterprise!

 

What you're saying it is true.

 

Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise!

 

Only serves to make us blue.

 

Yay Enterprise!

 

Those of us who must go fight

Just might lose our appetite.

 

Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise!

 

Yet still surely we can tell

That you Admirals mean well.

 

Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise!

 

Go, try to explode their war bird. Of past casualties we've not heard. Acts of heroism must now be spurred. Go you to get yourselves killed!

 

Go you to get yourselves killed!

For your foes are tough and violent

Dumb, smelly, none too silent

And on conquest, they all are hell bent

And thus your graves will all be filled.

 

We begin to see a link

'Twixt what you say and how you think

that no matter how we fight

We're simply no match for their might.

But still, we won't complain

For we're fighting in your name

And we certainly can tell

That you Admirals mean well.

 

Yes, we certainly can tell

 

That you Admirals mean well.

 

We can tell

 

You mean well.

 

We can tell

 

How you mean well!

 

Go ye Fleet Men, go and fight them! Though, they'll kill you in groups of ten. We'll stay here and write the orders. Go, fight for the Federation! Go get killed, or maybe just get injured, because none of you are ninjas. On bloodwine, we brass shall binge. Go ye Fleet Men go and fight!

 

Go ye Fleet Men, go and fight! Go ye Fleet Men, go and fight!

 

When the Klingons bear their guns

 

Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise!

 

Though we want to, no one runs

 

Yay Enterprise!

 

And we find the thing to do

 

Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise!

 

Is to ready all the crew

 

Yay Enterprise!

 

For when the warbird's here

 

Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise!

 

We really should appear

 

Yay Enterprise!

 

As though we think we'll win

And that we'll soon begin

And that we'll soon begin

 

Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay! Enterprise! Yay! Yay! Yay Enterprise!

 

Go ye Fleet Men, go and fight them to the death! Go yet fleet men, go and fight them to the death. Go, ye fleet men, go and fight them to the death. Go ye fleet men, go and fight them to the death.

 

Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay Enterprise! Yay! Enterprise! Yay! Yay! Yay Enterprise!

 

                                    Fight them, you will?

 

                                    Yes, yes, we'll leave.

 

                                    Those Klingons kill

 

                                    Yay! Enterprise!

 

                                    And your graves fill!

 

                                    Yay Enterprise!

 

                                    Yet, you're here still?

 

                                    All right, we'll leave!

 

                                    Yes, let's go fight Klingons! Yes, let's go fight Klingons!

 

                                    But you're not leaving!

 

                                    We'll leave. We'll leave. Yes, let's go fight Klingons. Yes, let's go fight Klingons.

 

            But you're not leaving!

 

            We'll leave. We'll leave

 

            At last, they're gone! At last, they're gone! At last they're really, really gone!

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