Revenge is indeed a very sweet
thing. Kirk had received an email, and he, in turn, sent it to all of his friends. Spock and McCoy received it and Spock had
convinced McCoy to fill it out. Afterwards, McCoy continuously bugged Spock until he agreed to fill it out as well. All's
fair. So here is Spock's profile.
Note to all audiences: Spock
and McCoy are bondmates.
NAME: Commander Spock cha'Sarek
HOME: Technically I am currently residing on the U.S.S. Enterprise, Service Number NCC-1701. But I also have
a villa in Shi'kahr on Vulcan.
HEIGHT: I am 6 ft. 3 in. but as Leonard would say, "I am a few inches taller than my
EYES: Sable (Len: And fathomless. I could stare into them for hours. Spock: Thank you, my mate.)
Short and black (Len: And very silky! Spock: Thank you Leonard.)
WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE TV SHOW? I am fond of Bill
Nye The Science Guy, although Leonard has an illogical disdain for it.
WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? An illogical question
considering the fact that the ships computer does not have a mouse.
FAVOURITE MAGAZINE: Wired: it keeps me up to date
on all of the computer science that an A7 computer expert needs to know about.
FAVOURITE SMELL: Sandalwood in small
amounts (Len starts to laugh. Spock: I do not see what is so funny Leonard.)
WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD: Pon farr
and the disaster that was my first kun-at-kali-fee.
BEST FEELING IN THE WORLD: My second Bonding, to Leonard in which
I was able to bask in the joy if our unity.
THINGS TO DO ON THE WEEKENDS: If by that you mean my off day, I have a
lot to do. Both Leonard and I have the same off day, and we spend a good portion of the time together. In addition, I have
been working on a new computer program that should make the computer 13% more efficient.
FAVOURITE SOUNDTRACK: The
Pirates of Penzance by Gilbert and Sullivan.
WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THOUGHT OF WHEN YOU WOKE UP THIS MORNING?
Leonard has the most fascinating tendency to snore.
DO YOU GET MOTION SICKNESS? Vulcans do not get motion sickness.
(Len whispers something. Spock: Now Leonard, that is hardly appropriate.)
ROLLER COASTERS DEADLY OR EXCITING? Neither.
They are an illogical waste of time. The last time I was on one of them, the Captain threw up on me. It was far from pleasant.
PEN OR PENCIL? Stylus or a Padd. I have no need for such primitive writing implements.
HOW MANY RINGS BEFORE
YOU ANSWER THE PHONE? If by that you mean the comm. signal, as quickly as possible. Of course, I have to. Leonard refuses
to answer it.
FAVOURITE FOODS: Plomik soup, Leonard's vegetable casserole, and strawberries. Also Leonard has introduced
chocolate mousse into my life. I must admit that it is quite satisfying. (Len: I win! Spock: Win what Leonard?)
YOU GET ALONG WITH YOUR PARENTS? If you disregard the fact that I was estranged from my father for 18 years, yes I do. They
seemed most pleased when Leonard and I joined.
HAVE YOU EVER BEEN CONVICTED OF A CRIME? Yes but it didn't count, because
two of the judges were illusions. And I don't regret having broken General Order 4. Captain Pike is much happier, and that
made it worthwhile. (Len: That's so sweet Spock. Spock: I suppose it is.)
CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA? Neither. I prefer
cinnamon in small amounts. (Len whispers something. Spock: Later)
CROUTONS OR BACON BITS? Croutons. Bacon is made
from pigs, and I am a vegetarian.
DO YOU LIKE TO DRIVE? It is an interesting form of transportation, but I prefer
the transporter. (Len: That makes one of us. Spock: Leonard, I am aware of your feeling toward the transporter. The entirety
of Starfleet is aware of your feeling towards the transporter. Len: That's not very nice Spock. Spock sighs.)
SLEEP WITH STUFFED ANIMALS? No. Although, Leonard has a stuffed- (Len: Shut up Spock!)
IF YOU COULD HAVE ANY KIND
OF PET, WHAT WOULD IT BE? A sehlat. I would name him Ichaya in memorial to my old companion.
IF YOU COULD BE ANY TYPE
OF ANIMAL WHAT WOULD YOU BE? An Organion, perhaps. But they could hardly be classified as "animals."
COOL OR SCARY: Neither, they are a natural occurrence. (Len: That's not the point Spock.) Although, when Leonard and I are
on shore leave I will stay and watch them with him.
IF YOU COULD MEET ANYONE DEAD OR ALIVE, WHO WOULD IT BE? Surak.
I met him once but it was not really him and he ended up getting killed. Also, Gandhi. A very profound man, for a human. (Len
grumbles something incoherent. Spock: What was that about my idols Leonard?)
FAVOURITE ALCOHOLIC DRINK: Saya, although
not technically an alcoholic beverage, it can still be rather intoxicating.
WHAT IS YOUR ZODIAC SIGN? Zodiac? We have
no such system on Vulcan. (Len: You act like a Taurus. Spock: What is that supposed to mean?)
EAT THE STEMS OF BROCCOLI?
Yes. What else would I do with them?
GUYS-IF A GIRL ASKED FOR THE SHIRT OFF YOUR BACK, WOULD YOU GIVE IT TO HER? Why
would she not have a shirt? But if she needed it, yes I would give it to her. It would be the logical thing to do.
YOU COULD HAVE ANY JOB YOU WANTED, WHAT WOULD IT BE? Director of the Federation Science Laboratories.
IF YOU COULD
DYE YOUR HAIR ANY COLOUR, WHAT WOULD IT BE? Why would I want to dye my hair? (Len: I think that you would look good as a blonde.
Spock raises his eyebrow.)
IF YOU COULD HAVE A TATTOO, WHAT AND WHERE WOULD IT BE? Leonard's name on my left shoulder.
HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN LOVE? Yes. I am in love with he who is my bondmate. I desire to spend the rest of our lives
as One. (Len: Do you really mean that Spock? Spock: Yes Leonard, always. <They kiss briefly.> Len whispers something.
Spock: Later Leonard, I promise.)
DESCRIBE YOUR DREAM WEDDING: I had my "dream wedding." Leonard and I were bonded
in a traditional Vulcan bonding ceremony. And I was not in the plak tow. Although, I think that I still owe him a "honeymoon."
I better consult the Captain on that.
WHAT IS ON YOUR WALLS IN YOUR ROOM? A hologram of Leonard and I after our Bonding,
a Picasso that was given to me by my mother, the Traditional tapestry of my clan, this illogical certificate that Leonard
made both me and Captain Kirk sign which shamelessly flaunts his surgical skills, my fire pot for meditation, the 3D chess
board, medical and scientific texts... Is it necessary to list everything?
IS THE GLASS HALF EMPTY OR HALF FULL? There
is no glass. As for the philosophical statement that underlies this question, it is neither. I see everything as it is.
IS YOUR FAVOURITE SNAPPLE? There is a lemon iced tea flavor that is quite pleasing to me.
ARE YOU A RIGHTY, LEFTY
OR AMBIDEXTROUS? Most Vulcans are ambidextrous, but due to my Terran heritage, I am right handed. (Len: And what wonderful
hands they are! Spock: You are taking special delight in this, are you not, Leonard?)
DO YOU TYPE WITH YOUR FINGERS
ON THE RIGHT KEYS? Obviously. How else would I type? Although, using the voice control is a much simpler and more efficient
way to get reports done.
IF YOU COULD BE ONE GARDENING TOOL, WHAT WOULD YOU BE? I must concur with my mate and say
that this question has less of a purpose than the others. Most illogical.
WHAT'S UNDER YOUR BED? Leonard's missing
socks. And a datachip that I had needed three months ago and had ended up having to rerecord, but there is no dust.
IS YOUR FAVOURITE NUMBER? (Spock raises and eyebrow. Len: Say 69! Spock: YOU did not write 69. Len: I have a favorite number.
Spock sighs.) Pi or I. (smug Vulcan grin)
WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CAR? I did not have a car. I had a hovercraft. I no
longer own it. I cannot recall exactly what model it was. (Len: What Spock? YOU can't remember something. Spock: Yes Leonard,
do you find this amusing?)
WHAT IS YOUR DREAM CAR? I do not have a "dream car." If I were to purchase a vehicle, it
would be practical. Although I must admit that some of those old-fashioned limousines looked very comfortable.
SPORT TO WATCH: I enjoy watching physical competitions. But fencing is by far the most fascinating to watch. Mr. Sulu has
done quite a commendable job in getting people interested in it.
SAY ONE NICE THING ABOUT THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS
TO YOU: The Captain is a very fair man and a very loyal Commander, both to his friends and his ship.
OF ALL THE PEOPLE
YOU SEND THIS TO, WHO IS LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND TO IT: Anybody who has any logic and does not have a nagging bondmate should
have the sense to not fill this out. But if a specific person were to be required, I would say Yeoman Rand. My attempt at
humor did not work when I was trying to make her feel better. I cannot fathom the female mind.(Len: Is that why you married
me? Spock: We have already been over this Leonard, why are you bringing it up again? Len: Hey, remember I was the one who
had wanted to ignore this in the first place. Spock: You made me fill it out. Len: After you made me do it. Spock: We will
"talk" to the Captain tomorrow. Agreed? Len: Yes, agreed. Spock: Good, now, my mate, how about we go retrieve some sandalwood
candles and a bottle of saya...)